It’s always in the quiet moments.
The drives alone.
The darkness after your sisters are sleeping.
The deep ache comes. The tears come.
I miss you so much.
I miss what should have been.
I miss all the moments we will never have.
I live in a fake fantasy that you and Miriam should both exist.
The fun amazing love and chaos you two would bring together.
I don’t understand.
I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m lonely, I’m thankful.
Every moment forward,
I’m so thankful for because I understand how precious and fragile this life can be.
Every laugh, cry, fever, tantrum, snuggle, I’m thankful for it all…
All I can do is hope that your heart valves gave someone else’s child a lifetime of happiness…
That we can continue to do good in your honor…
That you know how much you are loved and missed and I hope we are making you proud…
That I will see you again and hold you in my arms…
I love you always and forever 💜
Mama
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